Sweet, sweet redemption Aug 2, 2011 22:20:50 GMT -8
Post by Tulley Kennedy on Aug 2, 2011 22:20:50 GMT -8
Thank you very much, Kyle. And big ups to Kyle for getting me on the jumbotron - I got quite a bit of cache being able to tell my friends that I might have been able to get us up there and then, sure enough in the middle of the 5th, BAM, first ones up. I also took photos and videos and sent them to Amer. Suffice to say he has finally been forced to conclude what I have been desperately trying to say all along - Tulley ain't no vampire. I am 100% human, and ready to move on from this sordid tale of false accusations against me.
Since I took all the trouble to draft the post last week making fun of Amer, I am going to go ahead and post it anyways. It doesn't have the same impact as it would have had I been voted off last week and revealed human, but I don't want my hard work to go to waste. This was going to be my post immediately after the gazette was published if I got voted out, showing me to be human. I call it "An Ode to 100% Certainty."
OK Amer, I lost track of what you were saying in all those threads, can we get a recap of your stance?
Amer said:You add all that to the way he "noticed" all these vampire clues that lead back to me, and I can say I'm 100% sure it's Tulley.
100% sure? Really?
amer said:Fine. We'll call it 99% if that makes you happy.
Might want to drop that to 98%. So who should we have voted for again?
amer said:Anyone who doesn't vote for Tulley is going to have to come up with a pretty good explanation as to why
How about - you are full of shit? That sounds like a good enough reason to me. Still sure I am a vampire?
amer said:There's no possible way you're human.
There has to be SOME possible way, right?
amer said:The only possible way that Tulley could not be the vampire is if someone else was logging on as Tulley.
I still don't get it. Try explaining it in third person.
amer said:Amer won't feel foolish because there's no fucking way that you and the vampire both randomly logged on at the same time -- every single time the vampire has logged on.
Are you SURE there's no other explanation?
amer said:Either you're the vampire, or the vampire uses your computer.
Might want to come up with an option 'c' there. But I had a whole bunch of plausible reasons why you were totally wrong, what about those?
amer said:This is how I know that Tulley's excuses about "the vampire waited until I logged out and then he logged in" aren't possible.
Well then either you made a lot of stuff up or some impossible stuff happened. What was that Sherlock Holmes quote again? Oh ya,
Sherlock said:Once you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains, no matter how improbable, must be the truth.
Well folks I did my best to point out the fallacies in amer's argument, but what can I do? His screenshot was better than mine I guess. I hope you like floor shows, because you are about to get a song and dance for the ages. Take it away, Amer!
I have since buried the hatchet with Amer, but the lesson here is: no matter how certain you think you are of something, you can NEVER be 100% certain. Now go forth and kill justly!