|
|
Post by Evan on Jul 31, 2015 12:40:31 GMT -8
Swabbie, tell me two people who you want jailed by midnight PST Wednesday night.
Okay, so here's how it goes. We're combining our classic census with our classic "pick the highest number that nobody else picks" game.
Here is a survey. Reply to it in this thread. Fill out as much of it as you wish. For the "About You" questions, you will get one point for every answer that you make. But the answers have to be good, no one-word answer stuff. For the "about me" section, you will get a point for every question you answer correctly.
Whomever gets the highest score that nobody else gets will become jailer. In other words, if two people get ten points and only one person gets nine points, the person with nine points wins.
ABOUT YOU
1) How did you get to be a part of our grand new adventure?
2) Where do you call home?
3) Prior to joining up, how did you make your way in the world?
4) What is your ideal job/role on board the HMS Mildville?
5) What qualities make you suitable to be a pirate?
6) Write a two-line, rhyming pirate shanty
7) Where do you think we should sail, first, and why?
8) Explain why you are definitely not a mutineer
9) What do you think of this Kraken that we may have aboard?
ABOUT ME
1) What is my favorite pirate beverage?
2) What is my favorite pirate-themed piece of attire, and why?
3) What is my favorite type of booty to plunder, and why?
4) What is my favorite part of being a pirate?
Deadline to enter is Monday at 5 PM PST
|
|
Jack Tappers
Super Person
Ready to plunder yer booty
Posts: 208 
|
Post by Jack Tappers on Jul 31, 2015 14:29:21 GMT -8
*scratches arm spastically* I need my puzzle fix, man!
|
|
Jack Tappers
Super Person
Ready to plunder yer booty
Posts: 208
|
Post by Jack Tappers on Jul 31, 2015 22:20:53 GMT -8
Finally I got rum enough in me to do this
ABOUT YOU
1) How did you get to be a part of our grand new adventure?
I woke up one day on board with a roaring hangover, but once I learned to swab the poopdeck, I realized thar was no better place te be.
2) Where do you call home?
Me cottage with me wife, Clarence, for whom I will plunder all the booty that can be found.
3) Prior to joining up, how did you make your way in the world?
I ran a restaurant tha' served nothing but hardtack. It turned out my skills were better suited here.
4) What is your ideal job/role on board the HMS Mildville?
Rope rigger, both for sails and people... and cargo.
5) What qualities make you suitable to be a pirate?
Just look at me! I get all the booty.
6) Write a two-line, rhyming pirate shanty
Wave, gave the creakin' ship sway
Brave, knaves held it anyway
7) Where do you think we should sail, first, and why?
Panama. I bet if we could get some locals to help carry our cargo, we could avoid circumnavigating South America and grab a ship to take it to the Western Americans.
8) Explain why you are definitely not a mutineer
Mutineers want to have so few people left on the ship, and that's terrible.
9) What do you think of this Kraken that we may have aboard?
The Kraken is worse! It only wants itself left alive, which I doubt even those fucking mutineers want. They'd better help us find it.
ABOUT ME
1) What is my favorite pirate beverage?
Grog mixed with rum
2) What is my favorite pirate-themed piece of attire, and why?
The scarf, because it can be worn anywhere on the body
3) What is my favorite type of booty to plunder, and why?
Yer prime vessel's own fortune, fer ye love it more than all the gold in England.
4) What is my favorite part of being a pirate?
The beard upgrade that lets you dispense rum from it
|
|
|
|
Post by Richard "Swabbie" Flynn on Jul 31, 2015 22:31:12 GMT -8
ABOUT YOU
1) How did you get to be a part of our grand new adventure?
Hired on as the "Deck Surface Maintenance Engineer." Or "Swabbie" if ya prefer.
2) Where do you call home?
I've lived my entire life on the seas, drifting from ship to ship. My home where my head hits the pillow, typically on a fine ship!
3) Prior to joining up, how did you make your way in the world?
Hopped from ship to ship serving as a "Deck Surface Maintenance Engineer". Trained with the best to become the best!
Ask any ship from any nation, they'll tell you tales of my ability to keep a deck in pristine condition!
4) What is your ideal job/role on board the HMS Mildville?
I have worked on over 30 ships in my lifetime as a "Deck Surface Maintenance Engineer," and have numerous references from many esteemed captains.
Just ask Captain George Pollard of the Essex, or Captain Raymund Lourens of the good ship Vrouw Maria. Or any of the other dozens of captains I worked for in the past.
I'll send you my resume!
5) What qualities make you suitable to be a pirate?
Any good pirate ship needs a capable "Swabbie", and I am the best in the business!
I have decades of experience and nothing by the best references!
6) Write a two-line, rhyming pirate shanty
.
Swabbin the deck is the life for me,
/Yo, Ho, Whiskey Bobby!
Add a shot to my morning tea,
/Yo, Ho, Whiskey Bobby!
7) Where do you think we should sail, first, and why?
Barbados!
Just off the coast of the new world, is supposed to be a nice island with great people and many crops to be plundered!
The money that could be made off the tobacco alone could keep us funded for years!
8) Explain why you are definitely not a mutineer
No money in being a mutineer, and too much trouble to be had.
I just want to put in my hours doing what I do best and collect a fair share of the booty.
9) What do you think of this Kraken that we may have aboard?
Worrisome, I've heard scary things about creatures of the deep.
Never met one myself, hope if I do meet them, that they are not hungry when we meet.
ABOUT ME
1) What is my favorite pirate beverage?
A big fan of Whiskey myself.
2) What is my favorite pirate-themed piece of attire, and why?
Love me a good pirate hat!
Gotta keep the sun outta me eyes, as maintaining the decks is a long job, even longer in the sun!
3) What is my favorite type of booty to plunder, and why?
Love me some of the finer things, linens and cloths, be all comfortable like at the end of the day
4) What is my favorite part of being a pirate?
The Freedom, exciting life on the sea! Also, maintaining a ships deck is what I was born to do!
|
|
Annie McClarabow
Super Person
Owner of "All-Night Library"
Pay your library tab, errr I mean fines
Posts: 531
|
Post by Annie McClarabow on Aug 1, 2015 12:53:45 GMT -8
I guess that Jack is Son and Swabbie is Stinky Pete.
|
|
|
|
Post by Captain Jack Aubrey on Aug 2, 2015 18:00:47 GMT -8
1) How did you get to be a part of our grand new adventure?
I was knee deep in a tartuga whorehouse when I was swindled into some side work by an unknown creton. Apparently you need doubloons to have o'little fun.
2) Where do you call home?
Where me heart is. I dont need no actual home of mine. I be happy on t' lady sea
3) Prior to joining up, how did you make your way in the world?
I was a merchant sellin' bees t' rich people.
4) What is your ideal job/role on board the HMS Mildville?
I be needin' t' be t' clothes fixer
5) What qualities make you suitable to be a pirate?
I hate whales and they need t' die. I have one mean whale call.
6) Write a two-line, rhyming pirate shanty
You're a bitch Captain Mitch
Wont you throw the Pitch at the pirate?
7) Where do you think we should sail, first, and why?
Sail straight into your mother because its smooth sailin.
8) Explain why you are definitely not a mutineer
Mutineers be t' scum o' t' earth. They deserve traitor's deaths. I call their pants when they die.
9) What do you think of this Kraken that we may have aboard?
Snap, Kraken, then pop their head starboard off
ABOUT ME
1) What is my favorite pirate beverage?
Coke and Rum let me drown the sorrows
2) What is my favorite pirate-themed piece of attire, and why?
Holsters be my favorite piece of attire.
3) What is my favorite type of booty to plunder, and why?
The booty of the forbidden lady.
4) What is my favorite part of being a pirate?
Being the outlaw of the sea.
|
|
cid
Super Person
Posts: 130
|
Post by cid on Aug 2, 2015 20:31:30 GMT -8
1) How did you get to be a part of our grand new adventure?
To make a long story short. I was the Queen's offical head ship engineer, and the best one they had ever seen!
Until one day, a boot-load of ships disappeared and I was blamed for their disappearance because of poor designs!
I was sentenced to be executed, but I high-tailed away to one of the town's most "elegant" taverns, drank myself drunk,
and found myself aboard here.
2) Where do you call home?
That town used to be our home, but now I call every chug of my drink home.
3) Prior to joining up, how did you make your way in the world?
Oh don't get me started! I was a well known inventor! I designed and made ships, war machine, and airships if you believe that!
Kingdoms would pay me handsomely to design and build machines, until for some reason they disappear with thousands of souls.
When they start disappearing, there always seem to be a bounty on my head. But I hope on a ship to the next nation to build my
next greatest creations!
4) What is your ideal job/role on board the HMS Mildville?
If possible, Food and Rum Stock Accountant. But if not, Ship Engineer. I can make sure this boat stays above water and continue
sailing the open seas!
5) What qualities make you suitable to be a pirate?
I drink a lot. I smell. And I carry a pistol to make sure no one messes with me.
6) Write a two-line, rhyming pirate shanty
I take, I take the Queen's money with me
And say farewell towards the open sea!
7) Where do you think we should sail, first, and why?
Baron. I heard they are looking for someone to make them an airship.
8) Explain why you are definitely not a mutineer
Because I have a pistol. I would have shot the Captain and taken over the ship if I was an mutineer.
9) What do you think of this Kraken that we may have aboard?
I think the Kraken is the true cause of all of my missing ships! If I find out who is the Kraken, I swear by my bear-belly and pistol
that I will make him pay!
ABOUT ME
1) What is my favorite pirate beverage?
Rum. And lots of it.
2) What is my favorite pirate-themed piece of attire, and why?
My eye-patched. It makes the sun shine not so bright after drinking all day.
3) What is my favorite type of booty to plunder, and why?
Rum, or any booty to get me more rum.
4) What is my favorite part of being a pirate?
I get to go on a great adventure to the vast open unknown, with bottles of rum in both hands and many kegs of it behind me.
|
|
|
|
Post by merrymatey on Aug 3, 2015 5:33:33 GMT -8
ABOUT YOU
1) How did you get to be a part of our grand new adventure?
I was told that I was boarding the Titanic and I ended up here. I’m guessing that my odds of survival would have been better on the Titanic.
2) Where do you call home?
I don’t call home. I don’t get good cell phone reception out on the high seas.
3) Prior to joining up, how did you make your way in the world?
Mostly winning drinking contests at the local pubs.
4) What is your ideal job/role on board the HMS Mildville?
Captain, of course. Although that job was already taken; however, there may be another way…
5) What qualities make you suitable to be a pirate?
Pretty much sitting around my room with not much else to do.
6) Write a two-line, rhyming pirate shanty
There once was a foul-looking pirate
Who, forced to write silly rhymes, became irate.
7) Where do you think we should sail, first, and why?
Anywhere out of port, ‘cause the gendarmes are after me.
8) Explain why you are definitely not a mutineer
Impossible! I can’t handle heights.
9) What do you think of this Kraken that we may have aboard?
I pretty much try not to think about this Kraken and hope that this Kraken doesn’t think about me.
ABOUT ME
1) What is my favorite pirate beverage?
Navy Grog: 1/2 oz light rum; 1/2 oz gold rum; 1/2 oz dark rum; 1/2 oz Grand Marnier® orange liqueur; 1 oz grapefruit juice; 1 oz orange juice;1 oz pineapple juice, add ice and shake. The vitamin C wards off scurvy and the alcohol makes it so I don’t care.
2) What is my favorite pirate-themed piece of attire, and why?
My peg leg, for hiding my booze and booty.
3) What is my favorite type of booty to plunder, and why?
I don’t plunder. I’m very polite. I always say “please… or die.’
4) What is my favorite part of being a pirate?
The nice bathrooms aboard ship.
|
|
|
|
Post by Fluffy Rob on Aug 3, 2015 7:38:31 GMT -8
ABOUT YOU 1) How did you get to be a part of our grand new adventure? Got drunk while on vacation, fell asleep, woke up here. Where are we? 2) Where do you call home? Idaho. 3) Prior to joining up, how did you make your way in the world? Potato farmer. 4) What is your ideal job/role on board the HMS Mildville? I am excellent at peeling potatoes. 5) What qualities make you suitable to be a pirate? Truly none. Until recently, the largest body of water I'd ever seen was a puddle in my mom's driveway. 6) Write a two-line, rhyming pirate shanty Walk the plank, hey yo,Talk the stank, hey yo. 7) Where do you think we should sail, first, and why? I miss Idaho. 8) Explain why you are definitely not a mutineer I'm having a hard enough time standing upright without vomiting. That takes up all my free time and brain power. 9) What do you think of this Kraken that we may have aboard? What exactly does a "Kraken" look like? A big prawn? ABOUT ME 1) What is my favorite pirate beverage? Grog-aide. 2) What is my favorite pirate-themed piece of attire, and why? I guess my boots. But really, anything that doesn't smell like week old cod. 3) What is my favorite type of booty to plunder, and why? Jewels and coins are too heavy. I like to trade in secrets and blackmail. Not typical pirate fare but it keeps my belly full. 4) What is my favorite part of being a pirate? It's a pretty new gig for me and I could really leave the vomiting behind but I am making brisk business in trading secrets. Deadline to enter is Monday at 5 PM PST  |
|
|
|
Post by williammccoy on Aug 3, 2015 8:57:37 GMT -8
1) How did you get to be a part of our grand new adventure?
I was working as a dock worker at Port Moseby. I went out with a few mates to a local pub and then woke up on this ship.
2) Where do you call home?
I was living in Port Moseby but I am originally from Glasgow.
3) Prior to joining up, how did you make your way in the world?
As I said, I was a dock worker, why do you keep asking me questions I have already answered?
4) What is your ideal job/role on board the HMS Mildville?
Whats the name of the guy on the boat who works with the dock worker. I think I'd be good with that.
5) What qualities make you suitable to be a pirate?
None, I'm a DOCK WORKER!
6) Write a two-line, rhyming pirate shanty
I used to be a dock worker, I worked all day and drank all night.
Now I'm on a pirate ship where there is a scary kraken who wants to eat me for an afternoon bite.
7) Where do you think we should sail, first, and why?
Port Mosbey, so I can go back to being a dock worker.
8) Explain why you are definitely not a mutineer
Because all I want to do is get off this ship and go back to being a dock worker.
9) What do you think of this Kraken that we may have aboard?
I think he wouldn't like to eat me, I'm very gaimy.
ABOUT ME
1) What is my favorite pirate beverage?
Rum of course
2) What is my favorite pirate-themed piece of attire, and why?
Your snazy pirate hat.
3) What is my favorite type of booty to plunder, and why?
The local tavern wench because of her ample assets.
4) What is my favorite part of being a pirate?
To crush your enemies, to see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentations of their women.
|
|
|
|
Post by vitaminc on Aug 3, 2015 9:04:53 GMT -8
ABOUT YOU
1) How did you get to be a part of our grand new adventure?
I was drinking one night and stumbled into the alley to throw up. Something smacked me on the head and when I awoke I found myself on this godforsaken ship with a pamphlet talking about all the "adventures" that pirate life would give me.
2) Where do you call home?
A hammock above a some guy that smells like urine and febreeze. At least he tries.
3) Prior to joining up, how did you make your way in the world?
I was an accountant, mostly internal audit. I would check ship's for their cannon ball supplies, salted pork usage etc.
4) What is your ideal job/role on board the HMS Mildville?
Anything to get me off the ship. I took the examination for supply runner, but the test consisted of only two questions one of which was to write the lyrics to Danny Boy. I don't know if I passed or not.
5) What qualities make you suitable to be a pirate?
Nothing, I keep telling people that. I have soft hands, I can't swim, I don't know what a jib is.
6) Write a two-line, rhyming pirate shanty
Livin on the sea, on the constant search for booty,
Never seeing land or earth, please somebody, shoot me.
7) Where do you think we should sail, first, and why?
To a port, any port so I can jump off and swim for it.
8) Explain why you are definitely not a mutineer
Because I don't know what that term means. I don't know what any sea faring term means. They keep yeeling port and starboard, why can't they just say left or right?
9) What do you think of this Kraken that we may have aboard?
Great, another thing I have to worry about? Like being seasick every day isn't enough? I actually welcome the sweet release if it eats me.
ABOUT ME
1) What is my favorite pirate beverage?
Ale.
2) What is my favorite pirate-themed piece of attire, and why?
That cool hook hand, I seen you goose people with it all the time.
3) What is my favorite type of booty to plunder, and why?
Going to guess gold, universal currency, nice and shiny
4) What is my favorite part of being a pirate?
I think its the corny priate themed puns.
|
|
|
|
Post by pandapirate on Aug 3, 2015 9:26:00 GMT -8
ABOUT YOU
1) How did you get to be a part of our grand new adventure?
Drinkin at the tavern. Overhear a bunch of hooligans talking taking over the queen's ship. Town's tend to be too big for a callous panda. I know my place. It's with the drifters.
2) Where do you call home?
No home here. It's in ashes.
3) Prior to joining up, how did you make your way in the world?
I go from town to town. Try to join gangs. I'm the muscle in the group.
4) What is your ideal job/role on board the HMS Mildville?
The muscle/guard duty. Keep hooligans in line.
5) What qualities make you suitable to be a pirate?
I'm a fucking panda
6) Write a two-line, rhyming pirate shanty
No
7) Where do you think we should sail, first, and why?
Dont care. See number 5.
8) Explain why you are definitely not a mutineer
If you went to school, which no one here has, you would have learn pandas are like dogs-loyal.
9) What do you think of this Kraken that we may have aboard?
Let me get his neck in my jaws.
ABOUT ME
1) What is my favorite pirate beverage?
I eat everything.
2) What is my favorite pirate-themed piece of attire, and why?
blood
3) What is my favorite type of booty to plunder, and why?
People. I don't trust them.
4) What is my favorite part of being a pirate?
I'm good at it.
|
|
|
|
Post by The Dread Pirate Roberts on Aug 3, 2015 11:42:11 GMT -8
ABOUT YOU
1) How did you get to be a part of our grand new adventure?
Just a farm boy, looking for fortune and glory on the open seas.
2) Where do you call home?
Oh, just a little place called Florin. (The prince is a total jerk!)
3) Prior to joining up, how did you make your way in the world?
Dude, I said farm boy.
4) What is your ideal job/role on board the HMS Mildville?
Uh, captain, obviously. But I can work as valet until the position open up.
5) What qualities make you suitable to be a pirate?
I've killed a lot of people. I never take prisoners. The name alone inspires fear.
6) Write a two-line, rhyming pirate shanty
We own the seas, near and far,
We'll stab you twice if you look at us, yarrr!
7) Where do you think we should sail, first, and why?
The gulf stream. Many o' fat and juicy cargo ships waitin' to be plundered there.
8) Explain why you are definitely not a mutineer
A ship without a captain isn't a ship for long! Purge the mutineers from the ship. Make 'em walk the plank!
9) What do you think of this Kraken that we may have aboard?
A kraken of unusual size? I don't think they exist.
ABOUT ME
1) What is my favorite pirate beverage?
Tekillya
2) What is my favorite pirate-themed piece of attire, and why?
Yer skivvies (they hide yer precious booty)
3) What is my favorite type of booty to plunder, and why?
Diapers. Seriously, all kids do is poop. All day long. Poop, poop, poop. Diapers ain't cheap.
4) What is my favorite part of being a pirate?
Standin' at the bow of the ship and yellin', "I'm the king o' the world, yarrr!"
|
|
|
|
Post by Dread Pirate Rackham on Aug 3, 2015 14:03:01 GMT -8
ABOUT YOU
1) How did you get to be a part of our grand new adventure?
I was kidnapped while drinkin' at a Skull & Scuppers
2) Where do you call home?
Currently, me home be 'tis awful boat
3) Prior to joining up, how did you make your way in the world?
Not extra well indeed, but I made it as a dentist
4) What is your ideal job/role on board the HMS Mildville?
I can be in charge 'o gettin' crew to shout truth, usin' me dental expertise
5) What qualities make you suitable to be a pirate?
6) Write a two-line, rhyming pirate shanty
I never met a scurvy dog I did not admire
Till I landed here gunna all these men most dire
7) Where do you think we should sail, first, and why?
We sail somewhere to pick up more booze, that would be th' first place
8) Explain why you are definitely not a mutineer
We seem to currently have that be all I can take booze
9) What do you think of this Kraken that we may have aboard?
Kraken be legends 'n I do not believe
ABOUT ME
1) What is my favorite pirate beverage?
Rum and Rum
2) What is my favorite pirate-themed piece of attire, and why?
Trusty parrot, because it goes well wit' BBQ
3) What is my favorite type of booty to plunder, and why?
Pirate booty, th' tasty puffed snack, so tasty
4) What is my favorite part of being a pirate?
Th' acceptability 'o murder
|
|
eghot
Super Person
Posts: 40
|
Post by eghot on Aug 3, 2015 15:47:00 GMT -8
ABOUT YOU 1) How did you get to be a part of our grand new adventure? Gotye a strange message from ye pigeon 2) Where do you call home? Home ye t' high seas, grog, and bountiful booty 3) Prior to joining up, how did you make your way in the world? Pillaged ye vessels, enslaved thy vassals 4) What is your ideal job/role on board the HMS Mildville? global implementation specialist 5) What qualities make you suitable to be a pirate? Avast, I was born in th' sea, lived on th' sea 'n god willin' will die in th' sea 6) Write a two-line, rhyming pirate shanty Ahoy-when ye ship’s asailin’, yee spirits deflatin’ Avast-ye kraken is due for a shellakin! 7) Where do you think we should sail, first, and why? Lets tie this here rope 'n pillage that ship o'er yonder caus' we’re outa dis here grog. 8) Explain why you are definitely not a mutineer When I be sailin' t' high seas, no booty be unsafe not t' plunder. 9) What do you think of this Kraken that we may have aboard? I will go to the ends of the earth to murder that apparition ABOUT ME 1) What is my favorite pirate beverage? Hoppy grog2) What is my favorite pirate-themed piece of attire, and why? Burly beard-everlasting briscuit scent3) What is my favorite type of booty to plunder, and why? Treasured chests4) What is my favorite part of being a pirate? Morning zoomba classes wit' ye mates |
|
|
|
Post by Evan on Aug 3, 2015 16:16:51 GMT -8
With 11 points, Richard "Swabbie" Flynn has the highest score and becomes our first Jailer!
My Answers:
1. Favorite pirate beverage: Whiskey
2. Favorite pirate attire: The hat, why is it shaped like that, even?
3. Favorite type of booty to plunder: My wife's
4. Favorite part of being a pirate: No kids allowed on-board
|
|
|
|
Post by vitaminc on Aug 4, 2015 6:13:24 GMT -8
Boooo Richard!
|
|
Jack Tappers
Super Person
Ready to plunder yer booty
Posts: 208
|
Post by Jack Tappers on Aug 4, 2015 7:09:46 GMT -8
And victory to the... guy who answered the About Me section, about himself.
Use it wisely, my friend.
|
|
|
|
Post by Evan on Aug 4, 2015 7:25:00 GMT -8
And victory to the... guy who answered the About Me section, about himself. Use it wisely, my friend. Heh, so true. |
|
|
|
Post by vitaminc on Aug 4, 2015 7:56:11 GMT -8
And victory to the... guy who answered the About Me section, about himself. Use it wisely, my friend. Heh, so true. Uh, yeah, how did he get 11 points when technically he answered all the "About Me" questions wrong? |
|
